Way back in October, probably in response to my Chats With Cool Folk #3 with Danette and James https://totallyfantastictitle.podbean.com/e/ep-21-chats-with-cool-folk-3-danette-boucher-and-james-douglas/, I ordered Stephen King’s On Writing from the library. I have never read a Stephen King novel, and haven’t seen many of the movies. They’re just not my thing. I saw Carrie way back when, and the Shawshank Redemption is brilliant. Same with Stand By Me, which I didn’t even know was based on a King story. Oh, and of course I saw The Doctor’s Case, (as we discussed in that chat with James and Danette). Anyway, regardless of what he writes I have heard over and over that his book On Writing is a must-read. The book finally arrived and I started reading it last night. He talks about a time in the 8th grade when he and a buddy went to the movies and saw Edgar Allen Poe’s The Pit and the Pendulum. He was so struck by it that he decided to write the, as he called it, the “novel version”… He printed it off, in his words, “blissfully unaware that I was in violation of every plagiarism and copyright statute in the history of the world.” (S. King’s On Writing, Pg. 48). And he sold them at school. A teacher caught the situation and called a halt, made him give back all the money he’d made.
Worst of all, this teacher said to him, and I’ll just read this to you:
“ ‘What I don’t understand, Stevie,’ she said, ‘is why you’d write junk like
this in the first place. You’re talented. Why do you want to waste your abilities?’ ”
And then I’ll just skip a little bit… It goes on to say,
“She waited for me to answer. To her credit the question was not entirely
rhetorical, but I had no answer to give. I was ashamed. I’ve spent a good
many years since, too many I think, being ashamed about what I write. I think I
was forty before I realised that almost every writer of fiction and poetry who has
ever published a line has been accused by someone of wasting his or her god-
given talent. If you write. Or paint, or dance, or sculpt, or sing, I suppose,
someone will try to make you feel lousy about it. That’s all. I’m not editorializing,
just trying to give you the facts as I see them.”
And then skip a little bit more, and he just finishes up that section:
“In my heart I stayed ashamed. I kept hearing Miss Hissler asking why I wanted
to waste my talent, why I wanted to waste my time, why I wanted to write junk.”
(S. King’s On Writing, Pg. 49/50).
What strikes me about this is that it is so relatable.Have you been told you’re wasting your talent? or your time?
Have you ever been made to feel ashamed for the choices you’ve made? For your hobbies? The music you like? The movies or books you like?
I mean they’re choices right? And who is to say that the work you’re doing is junk? In whose opinion?
Don’t listen to them. Like I said to the kids who used to make fun of my pants in Junior High school, “Don’t like them? Don’t look at them. Certainly don’t wear them.”
Dealing with those twits wasn’t difficult because I really truly did not give a shit about their opinion on my pants.
It was, I’ll admit, more difficult to deal with my negative influence about writing Fantasy because so often the biggest influencers in our lives are people we hold aloft in some way, we admire them. So when they pass on negative comments, we tend to believe them.
The trick is recognizing it for what it is so that you can turn the volume down on that person. It took me a long time to even notice it was happening. But when I finally did, I made the decision to stop needing that person’s affirmation. Coz I wasn’t ever going to get it.
I wish you all the strength you need to recognize those negative influences, and to turn their volume down.